36 Things I Learned When I Was 36 Going On 37

First off, I am feeling extra grateful for this year as we are no longer in a pandemic, it's my last birthday being pregnant, and I am getting my meet my son this year

Here's a list of 36 things that I learned during this past year alone!

  1. If you don't put the things you value the most (relationships, self care) on your to do list or calendar, they'll get lost in favor of things you value less. I was better at prioritizing this in my 36th year than my 35th and I plan to get even better at it during my 37th year.

2. Order food ahead of time as much possible. Whether it’s bagels at your favorite place or lunch out with your toddler, call the establishment ahead of time and place your order. The online or over the phone line is SO MUCH SHORTER THAN THE REGULAR LINE. This hack has saved me countless times this year. I’ll always call in my order whenever possible.

3. Always bring a shopping cart into the grocery store. I do this even if i am only planning to get 1 or 2 things. I never get “just a few things" in the end and i always regret every time I forgo the cart. Also, keep a sweater in the car to wear in the grocery store… it makes the experience a million times more pleasant. Both of these pieces pf advice come straight from my mother to me, but I finally listened consistently this year and i am way happier.

4. Eating a small salad before a meal has kept my blood sugar more stable throughout the day. This method went out the window the first 20 weeks of pregnancy, but it’s back now, and it helps a lot.

5. Exercise is just as important for my mental health than it is for my physical health — if not, more. Finding something I love had made me extremely consistent. It took me two + years into motherhood to finally get back into my groove. I don’t plan on ever losing my groove for that long ever again if I can help it. I’m a better person when I can take that kind of time for myself.

6. The state of the world right now can make it feel scary to have kids, but in reality, people have always lived through very scary times. For sure, there are lots of reasons not to have kids, but fear of the direction the world is going in doesn't need to be one. Having a child can be a brilliant way of saying "i believe we can build a better world" and maybe the motivation that we need in order to do so… my dad taught me this lesson during his speech at my brother and sister in laws wedding rehearsal when I was 36- and I love that kind of optimism.

7. Micro walks make a macro difference. Even if they are less than 5 minutes- they can adjust my entire attitude to take that reset. I think science agrees with me that this is a great way to reset your energy.

8. I’m in a time of life where I like to listen to podcasts even more than music. Even during a workout.

9. I will never remember that idea later if I don’t write it down. It doesn’t matter how unforgettable it might seem. Write everything down immediately either in notes or in my joint calendar with Sam in order to decrease the burden of forgetting. My husband drilled this notion into my brain and it finally stuck this year.

10. Electrolyte water makes me less dehydrated.

11. I don’t have to feel guilty about not liking everything about parenthood, even though it took me a while due to infertility to get to being a parent.

12. I can say “no” to things and not feel bad about it if it’s what’s right for me and my family. Took me a long time to get to this place in life and it’s very freeing.

13. A daily and nightly skincare ritual makes a huge difference.

14. I can leave my kid in the care of other people and she will be better for it.

15. I’m blessed to have my brother and sister-in-law live down the street from me. I’m thrilled that we are going to live our lives in the same town in our forever homes. That truly is a blessing because Sam and I really love and like both of them.

16. There is nothing better than quality time alone with my husband besides quality time with us together with our kid(s).

17. My daughter is the funniest person I’ve ever met. I’ll never love anything as much as I love my children even on the toughest days.

18. I continue to be grateful to my parents and my in-laws for prioritizing their children and setting such a good example.

19. Motherhood doesn’t have to diminish my dreams that I have for my career. There have been many pockets of times that have felt hopeless for me to do both, but I refuse to let myself down in this way.

20. Hiring an interior designer when building a new home was probably the smartest decision I made when I was 35, but a decision that carried on throughout my 36th year that brought me so much joy and decreased our stress levels. Sam and I are obsessed with our new home and it wouldn’t be what it is without the help of professionals who know better than we do.

21. Being able to go to the hospital to visit your friend and their new baby without a mask and being able to stay for an hour and a half and visit was one of the best moments not only in my 36th year of life —but ever. I’ll never take that for granted, especially after all the time that we lost during the pandemic.

22. Book Club’s are good for friendship.

23. There has been nothing quite as cathartic as commiserating with cousins about everything in life, big and small, as well as celebrating. The cousin relationship should not be taken for granted.

24. Renting clothes during this pregnancy (which is my last) was a really smart idea.

25. No one could’ve prepared me for how hard it is to potty train, but also how rewarding it is to see your child so proud of themselves when they nail it.

26. Wearing sunscreen on my face every day is a good idea.

27. When your drivers license expires, they will make you take your picture over again even if you are 1 million years pregnant, but the good news is you can actually go back and get your picture taken again before it expires if you hate it! I feel like that good news carried me through the process even though there is a less than 1% chance that I will go back to the DMV and take the picture over again even if I look scawy.

28. The more the years go by, the more that I miss the people that I have lost. Time doesn’t heal all wounds.

29. I pretty much forgot everything that I learned during the newborn phase, and I will have to learn it all over again before my second child is born. I have no idea how I blocked everything out, considering that I pride myself on having such a good memory in general, but I remember absolutely nothing when it comes to the eating and sleeping schedule. Must re-learn.

30. If you play “Marry, F*&k, Kill and the options are “chicken fingers, mozzarella sticks and onion rings” one of your best friends of over 30+ years will choose to kill mozzarella sticks, and you still have to be friends with her somehow. Probably the hardest lesson I learned at age 36.

31. The world is set up really unfair for people over the age of 65. I had to help my friend submit medical bills to Aetna and the level of technology that they expect baby boomers to know is criminal. They don’t make it easy to do anything, and it feels intentional. Help out a boomer with technology if you can. I sort of want to stab myself in the eye half of the time I need to instruct my parents how to use their own television for the 20 Millionth time, but they deserve my help and respect even if I’m screaming internally.

32. Cleaning the countertops before bed is one of my favorite ways to wind down.

33. Stealing streaming from all of my relatives and not paying for any of them makes me a mooch, but it was one of the best things I did as a 36-year-old!

34. It’s true that the older you get the less you give a shit about what other people think about you.

35. My child has the best educators I could possibly ask for and I am grateful to the state of New York and Westchester County for providing us access to the best help and education I could have ever received for my kid. I am also grateful to God for this blessing because it’s something that Sam and I pray over and give thanks for every day. Talia’s educators love and respect her in a way that I’ll never be able to repay them for.

36. Springing for clothing hangers that are uniform was totally worth the money.